A need for a tribe

Lately, with everyone moving away or talking about moving I have been sad. If you looked at me, you wouldn't know it cause...you know, I'm a tough guy. But a week ago, while driving to a far away destination, I kinda broke down in my minivan and really was grieving the loss of some close friends. My church family structure has been in upheaval for the last few years as well and it takes so long to get to know new people that I am not that keen on the prospects. One of the main reasons for this is it takes a long time to define yourself. You have to define you normal self as well as your weird self balanced against the parts of yourself that is ugly or just plain unkind. And many times, by the time you define who you are the person you have opened up to figures out they don't like you and never will, leaving you with the process of starting over again.

This made me think about how it must have been way back when towns were small or people lived in tribes. In the past, I have only thought of the downside of such an arrangement. The myopic view of the world, the limited opportunities and the lack of privacy seemed to outweight any good that could come from such a communal paradigm. However, lately stacked up against the alternatives I find myself pining for such an establishment. Think about the fact that tribal chief never moves on to become chief of a better and bigger tribe. Roles within the community aren't necessarily based on popularity or prestige cause how do you look down upon the only source of clean water bearers or food preparation experts or cloth menders-every role is life essential. Lives are intertwined so closely that it would be hard to hide an "issue"; stuff would have to be dealt with.

We scoff at the ways of the amish or native americans while we chase after emptiness and success that never brings happiness or internal peace. I guess like Neil Young said, "keep on rockin' in the free world" cause the alternative would be....change.